What kind of farmer's wife can't make jam?

I adore jam and until recently, could not be swayed from my favourite kind and all-time-classic – raspberry. Lately, however, my eyes (and mouth) have been opened to the lush conserves lovingly created by friends and family: Sarah’s squidgy blueberry, Jill’s viscous redcurrant and peach, Gran’s Victoria plum.

I may be passionate about homemade preserves, but sadly I’m not particularly adept at making them, something I discovered the summer after the farmer and I moved in together several years back. We decided to have a ‘jam off’, he being as big a fan of the stuff as me. With half the stove each, we began our jam-making in earnest; weighing and measuring ruby red rasps and snow white sugar, washing and sterilising three dozen or so saved jars. But pouring the glittering granulated from its paper bag, I was alarmed at the vast amount dictated by Delia so decided, in my wisdom, to reduce the quantity in my batch.

Of course, it didn’t set and was a murky maroon colour to boot - a result of over boiling. Meanwhile, the farmer’s jam was a glowing jewel-bright scarlet with a perfect spoonable consistency...I couldn’t believe it! (Don’t even get me started on his sets-every-time strawberry...)

I didn't fare much better in subsequent years, so resorted to making freezer jam with liquid pectin, removing the irksome boiling stage entirely. Chutneys and marmalade I can manage, but I seem to have a real problem with preserves. (What kind of farmer’s wife can’t make jam??) So when my mother-in-law offered me a box brimming with bloomy violet damsons picked from her garden last week, I accepted with gusto, determined to transform them into the most delectable damson jam.

Last night after supper, I set about squeezing the tiny stones from ripe fruits, weighed and warmed the sugar and tipped it into a stainless steel pan - big mistake. Once the sugar had dissolved, I whacked up the heat and set it to boil for 10 minutes while I checked emails - bigger mistake. Within 5 minutes, the kitchen was filled with the autumnal smell of...toffee apples! I ran to the pan and peered down at the bubbling vermillion sludge. Too late, I gave it a stir and sure enough, the bottom of the pan was encrusted with caramelised damsons. Maybe, I hoped desperately, the jam on top would be okay. I removed a teaspoonful and left it to cool a little on the side. I stuck my finger in it and tasted: still toffee apple. Damn you, you damsons! The jam-making jinx strikes again...

FOOLPROOF FREEZER JAM
500g fresh berries
900g caster sugar
2 tbsp fresh lemon juice
125ml liquid pectin

Crush the raspberries with a potato masher or back of a wooden spoon in a large bowl or pan. Add the sugar and lemon juice and stir thoroughly. Leave for a few hours in a warm place until the sugar has completely dissolved. Add the liquid pectin and stir for a minute or two. Cover and leave to set overnight. Spoon into freezer proof tubs, label and freeze (keeps for at least 6 months). Defrost as needed and store in fridge after defrosting.