Fitness Drive...

After another weekend snuggled up watching the lithe, oddly fatless bodies of the Strictly Come Dancing professionals followed by The X Factor’s enviably polished and toned Danni Minogue, I decided I could no longer sit on the sofa and moan about my expanding waistline while doing nothing about it.

Apart from the lack of exercise, my main problem is that I love my food.

Gone are my single days of surviving on a diet of Cosmopolitans and brown basmati with steamed broccoli because since marrying, I feel I’m now legitimately allowed to eat a proper dinner every night – spaghetti carbonara; roast pork and apple sauce; braised lamb shanks and roasted pepper cous cous; homemade fish and chips; chicken, butterbean and pea risotto; sausage and mustard casserole with creamy mash etc etc – as I can hardly expect the farmer to eat brown rice and broccoli after a hard day’s work on the farm, can I?

However, since marrying I have also gained an average of 3lbs a year... So yesterday, I dug out my jogging bottoms, donned my trainers (and several layers) before selecting an appropriately motivating playlist on my iPod. I would run round the track encircling the farm – something that used to take a manageable 15 minutes pre-wedding – I decided sensibly, not wanting to do too much after doing so little for 5 years.

And I started off really rather well, running at a respectable pace past the field full of sheep wintered here from my father-in-law’s farm, on past the croft house and along the line of modern bungalows. Despite a slight stitch in my side, I was especially determined not to stop in front of these houses, being the abodes of the house objectors (Bonfire of the Vanities) and even found the energy to belt out the chorus of the track I was listening to: ‘It’s not fair and I think you’re really mean, I think you’re really mean, I think you’re really mean...’

Since it wasn’t yet 4pm, there probably wasn’t anyone home to hear my tuneless Lily Allen lyrics but it helped me push on through. Yet by the corner, just over half way round, I was forced to slow to a walk, the searing pain in my side not abating until I was almost back home. Still, it was a start, I thought, vowing to make this my new afternoon ritual.

Today, I can hardly walk.

So I’ve decided to give myself a day off and see how I feel tomorrow. Venison steaks with potatoes dauphinoise for tea tonight, followed by a bit of Waterloo Road and Spooks, I think.